My marriage counselor has been urging me to begin trauma therapy for PTSD for about a month now. I’ve been afraid to because Bear and I have been doing so well and I don’t want to have another meltdown. Then COVID happened, and I was even more afraid.
It turns out trauma therapy is not that hard to begin, but I suggest anyone reading this doesn’t do this alone. Please consult your friendly neighborhood psychologist.
Every Sunday, I write in a journal one traumatic memory. Then the rest of the days of the week, I read the memory aloud. On Saturday I read and process the memory with my counselor and my husband.
I’ve only been doing this for two days now and chose a relatively mild memory to start out with as I’m going through a medication change. I need to come up with a list of things for my husband to watch out for. So far, here’s what I’ve got:
- Sudden lack of communication
- Not wanting to cook
- Sudden willfulness in my attitude against him
- Sudden negative talk about our marriage
- Use of the ‘D’ word (no, not the body part…)
- Staying in bed all the time
Although, parts of these do sound like a pain flare, honestly. But parts of these sound like my version of a nervous breakdown.
Overall I’m glad I took the plunge while my husband is working from home so I can be monitored. I’ve been told that doing trauma work could possibly cure my pain, along with switching off of my psych med.
It’s gonna be a wild ride!