SAS Shoes Review – Cozy Slide Sandal

I have been taking steroids in order to walk around without a mobility aid. Somehow I can get up at 6AM and do yoga, but after that I have difficulty moving. A big problem is that my legs and feet are as big as water balloons. They constantly itch and burn, and it’s hard to put any pressure on them at all. Imaginably, this makes walking almost impossible.

This past week, I had to go into town for a doctor’s appointment. I had my cute pink mask on, and the only pair of shoes I could get my feet into – some Franco Sarto Chelsea boots I had gotten as a Christmas present. While sitting in the passenger’s seat, I had to peel off the boots 3 times because of how badly my feet were swelling.

Eventually, my husband, family and I decided that I needed to get some high quality shoes that would be versatile in Texas. My mom has owned and worn a single pair of San Antonio Shoemakers, SAS, sandals for 35 years. She bought them right before her wedding to my dad. The shoes are handmade in San Antonio and I discovered when I walked into the store it was the kind of place that didn’t have prices listed anywhere. Fancy.

I settled on a pair of straight-up Velcro sandals fairly quickly by asking for help (as I was in my boots, I needed to get out of those things and be assisted while sitting down). They were the Cozy Slide Sandal in a double wide. This time in stores they were on sale for $114, the shop keep told us – if you click the link, you’ll find the full price.

A thick-soled cream colored open heeled sandal with velcro straps and a "SAS" insignia
My sandal, which was a gift from my husband for our 6 month anniversary.

The Cozy Slide Sandals are really, really comfortable – and they do their job in assisting me in moving around without a mobility aid. I wear them all around the house because they feel like walking on clouds. This adds a layer of fluffy but structured cushion between me and the floor, making it easier for my feet to hold up to individual steps.

The sandals might not be the most fashion-forward, but I was so relieved and proud of them that I took a couple of pics of them on my feet. (These will  not be shown, because, well, I don’t want to end up on a google search for fat feet. I have sick feet, not fat feet, thanks.) I purchased the matte cream color that still sparkles a little in the light. The versatile color and the fact I’m in Texas means I’ll be able to wear these 2/3 of the year with basically any outfit. And for the price, I will probably be wearing them with all of my outfits.

I used to tease my mother about her SAS sandals, because to my young self they looked like old lady shoes, but I totally understand now. Hopefully these last 30+ years. I’m not much of a shoe person, but nothing quite feels like a brand new pair of shoes. With the addition of my neuropathy and swelling, shoe buying has a new layer to the hunt. Knowing where to look certainly helps.

Self-Care For Fibromyalgia

woman receiving massage with pink border. text: "self care for fibromyalgia"

I’ve been off the internet for a while trying to figure out good ways to care for myself as I went through my latest pain flare and manic episode. With the help of my EMDR therapist, I came up with a daily routine, scheduled by the hour, for about 4 different tasks I could do, excluding morning quiet time hour.

I’ve been practicing a rough version of the routine for about 4 days now, and it really helps when the anxiety kicks in. Knowing I have something to do at all times is extremely grounding. In the back of my mind I do know I have something to do at all times, but having a printed out schedule for a visual cue really helps.

So, my biggest tip for fibromyalgia self-care is to have a broken up schedule, especially for days you don’t work, or to manage your work day.

Morning Quiet Time Hour

I have about 7 tasks I do in morning quiet time hour. That sounds like a lot, but they’re all in the same vein – spiritual and relaxing.

I begin by putting on some chakra healing music. Then there’s yoga, with a minimum of 5 asanas (AKA poses), each held for 10 breath cycles. After this I grab some water and I meditate for at least 10 minutes, maybe more, to a morning time meditation on gratitude. Then I do intention setting, a type of meditation where you place your hands on your heart and reflect on what makes you afraid, what gives you strength, and a spiritual power. The point is to find a word that comes to mind when reflecting on the spiritual power to center your day around. When you know your word, write it on a piece of paper and place it in a drawer or your pocket, and at the end of the day read what it was. Once I find my word, or intention, I write a gratitude list with the chakra music on and sit in the dark until the sun comes up. Once the sun is up, I grab a coffee and sit on my back porch with a sacred text to read and my journal to reflect in. The point of this last step is to grab the first 20 minutes of sunlight.

I do set an alarm every day to wake up before everyone else. Some might think this is pretentious or impossible, but I really do think with fibromyalgia personal quiet time is key to starting off your day right. Investing in yourself alone and having niches for yourself is paramount to cultivating positive energy that you will need to fight the pain off throughout your day. Sometimes putting in a little more effort at the start results in ease the rest of your day.

The Rough Schedule

7AM is breakfast and more coffee. I mix up writing, laundry and job hunting until 11AM, when I hop in the shower and make sure I’m dressed with my hair and full makeup done for lunch. After lunch, around 12:30 I do “music in the dark” – either chakra healing music or my favorite tunes of the day for thirty minutes to an hour. At 1 to 1:30 PM I start continuing education. I have a few free Udemy courses on web design and writing I’m taking, and I spend this time until 5pm with a few music and writing breaks. It’s time to cook dinner at 5. After the family finishes at 7, I either hang out with a friend over Zoom or read a book and do a DIY home spa. Lastly, I finish the day with a relaxing meditation. I’m done by 9:15, and it’s off to bed.

DIY Home Spa

I’m big on physical pampering to fight fibromyalgia. I like to feel physical joy, and I take pride and pleasure in grooming myself. This is why I put on makeup every day and do my hair. Another thing I like to do is take a large tupperware container, big enough for both my feet to be submerged in water, and put a kettle of hot water (not boiling), 2 cups regular temperature water, 1 cup lavender epsom salts, 1 cup coconut oil, and 10 drops eucalyptus essential oil in it. I have a little space of the house to myself and a comfortable chair. Then I turn off all the lights, light a candle and soak my feet for 20 minutes while reading a light, fluffy book and listening to my current favorite music. If you do the foot soak, be sure to put lotion on your feet afterwards!

The alternative variation of my nightly home spa is a epsom salt bath without the coconut oil and two cups of epsom salts.

Why I Take Selfies

Today, I had to take steroids. For the third time this week I ended up walking around the house using my wedding cane. It was terrible but the steroids helped and I’m keeping my legs elevated.

Another thing about today and the other days of the week I’ve used a mobility aid, whether I’ve left the house or not, I’ve done a full hair and makeup getup, and worn a pretty dress. Yesterday I tried the Pinterest listerine pedicure, which exfoliated my feet but turned them blue, and painted my nails red. I’ll probably stick to Korean feet masks.

Every time I make myself pretty, I take a selfie because of all the extra effort that went into it, especially if it was on a bad day. I am proud of the work it took to doll myself up, whether it’s a pedicure, skincare, an outfit, my hair, my makeup, or a mix.

Going back to being a child, I have found strength in my femininity. Many people denounce selfies as vain, but after my illness, it’s simply me saying, “hey, I did it!”

I’m not looking for attention or accolades. Just the fact that I did it for myself and have something to look back on is enough to help me fight my battle against chronic illness.

Do I always do this? No. But it helps when I do.

Whatever helps you take a step forward, do it.

Wedding Planning For Spoonies: Now With Actual Spoons! 🥄

It’s time for book talk! I’m back to almost 20,000 words after getting the book down to 16,000. That’s quite a feat for a week. And now I have this adorable cover!

It probably is a bit cisgender – but I wanted the rainbow background for a reason. Please give me some #feedback for fun!

For those who don’t know, this is a wedding planning book for the chronically ill and disabled that covers LGBTQ+ as well as cisgender weddings.

I am bad at social media

When I was growing up, friends always told me I should be a marketer.

I’m trying my hand at it now, and I’m telling you, I am SO BAD at it.

I’ve been sharing some of my articles at various places (Facebook, LinkedIn) and they barely get any traction. It’s horrible. The only platform I have any connection on is Twitter.

Maybe I should take a marketing class? I’m already certified in SEO, but that isn’t working well for this website either.

It’s duncehat time!!!

Wedding Planning for Spoonies: Inspiration & tips for the chronically ill and disabled

My wedding planning book is going through a few iterations right now. I hope to still work with my editor after doing something really really stupid (in a pain flare I should never email people at night). The plan is to focus on mobility aid users and the chronically ill. It casts a wide net. There are many conditions specifically included, but a few from the categories can be chosen to apply to someone whose condition is not specifically listed.

I’m a bit nervous about the rewrite as it’s a blow to my ego, but I have to remember the point is to help people.

I do think this book could be a game changer if I work hard enough on it.

I’d also appreciate comments on whether or not excluding sight and hearing still makes the book marketable, and how much you like the new title.

If you’re interested in helping, email me at spoonielifestyle@gmail.com.

How to Survive a Night of Insomnia

Lately I’ve been getting up at 11pm, 1am, or most recently, 2am, and despite my best efforts, have been unable to fall back asleep. I’ve tried everything from meditation, medication, to alcohol, and I still can’t nod off. Unfortunately I tend to do stupid and impulsive things at night, especially just before dawn. I’ve compiled a list of things for my fellow insomniacs to do while they’re up in the early morning.

1. Read a happy book.

Don’t read anything scary. Not a thriller. Not a mystery novel. A book. A happy book.

2. Try one night cap a week.

I take a shot of whisky when I get really, really desperate. Just one. If you struggle with alcohol I’m sorry I wrote this part and please don’t do this. It doesn’t put me to sleep but it calms my nerves and I actually don’t do stupid things due to my anxiety and rumination.

3. Write something.

I work on my book, The Disability-Friendly Wedding Planner, blog posts, and my 27 memoirs, as well as my running diary.

4. Listen to binaural beats.

These have never in my life put me to sleep but they help with pain and anxiety.

5. Hop on Twitter and make friends.

Twitter is my favorite social media platform. I can spend hours on there discovering new things.

6. Daydream on Pinterest, but only a little.

Pinterest can be triggering for me, so I tend to stay off of it. But sometimes it can be fun.

7. Virtually volunteer.

I virtually volunteer at a few places and get my work done overnight, because I’m going to feel horrible during the day anyway.

8. Play with the doggy.

This is the best part about early mornings. I have an elderly dog, and she’s only active in the mornings and evenings. She sits in my lap, dances around, and acts cute. Unfortunately the affection ends after I feed her at 6am. Gee, I wonder why!

I hope this helps some of you. Insomnia can be a real bear. I haven’t figured out the cure for it yet. We’re all in this together!

Keep Fishin’

Usually, no matter how bad my pain flare is, I wake up at 5am at the latest, do Tai Chi, have a blog post out by 9:30 edited a few times with a graphic, have eaten breakfast and downed 3 cups of coffee by 10am.

Presently I’ve been in a stress-induced pain flare. The pain has been worse than when I’ve first been diagnosed with fibromyalgia, when I would scream at night, sob while I read the bible, all because of the physical pain I was in. It was a nightmarish experience. Once I started the meds and began to get better, I thought that would never happen again.

The past 3 weeks I’ve had horrible insomnia, which has been a plague for me on and off for about two years. Last night I slept 12 hours.

Normally, this would not be a problem. But I’ve been applying for virtual volunteer positions, and I had an interview at 10am, and woke up at 10:55am.

Well, I may have missed an opportunity to make the world a better place, but my body feels much better and I may actually be able to do Tai Chi today.

What I mean to say is, for anyone else going through this, don’t give up, or as my favorite band Weezer would say, Keep Fishin’:

You’ll never be
A better kind
If you don’t leave
The world behind

Waste my days (Waste my days)
It drowns aways (Drown aways)
It’s just the thought of you
In love with someone else
It breaks my heart, to see you hangin’ from your shelf

You’ll never do
about:blankThe things you want
If you don’t move
And get a job

Waste my days (Waste my days)
It drowns aways (Drown aways)
It’s just the thought of you
In love with someone else
It breaks my heart, to see you hangin’ from your shelf

Oh girl when I’m in love with you (Do wah)
Keep fishin’ if you feel it’s true (Do wah)
There’s nothing much that we can do
To save you from yourself

Waste my days (Waste my days)
It drowns aways (Drowns aways)
It’s just the thought of you
In love with someone else
It breaks my heart to see you hangin’ from your shelf

Oh girl when I’m in love with you (Do wah)
Keep fishin’ if you feel it’s true (Do wah)
There’s nothing much that we can do
To save you from yourself

You’ll never be
A better kind
You’ll never be
A better kind

Waste my days (Ohhh)

Keep fishin’ y’all.

(Yes I know these are super lazy posts but I’m trying to still crank something positive out every day. Wait, that wasn’t a positive statement. It’s okay. I’m doing the best I can, me.)

It’s OK

I wasn’t sure what to write about today.

I woke up at 2:00AM in extreme pain, but that’s okay. It went away eventually and I fell back asleep.

As I erroneously look forward in my life, ever playing the fortune teller, I see black clouds hanging ahead. But I know that this is false thinking, and not what is actually true. Life can be hard sometimes, but it’s our perspectives that make seeing visible. If you purposefully put a towel over your eyes, you cannot see anything in your world. The world is dark and precarious. However, you are responsible for this. You can realize you have something covering your face and take it off, or you can see it in your hands and not put it on.

I juggle with the face-cover, sometimes blinding myself and sometimes enlightening myself within the cycle of minutes throughout the day. And that’s okay.

I’m human. So are you. We all are.

Fibromyalgia Awareness Day

Purple sea with the text fibromyalgia awareness day

Apologies for not writing this sooner, my fellow fibros. My life caught on fire again and I found myself trying to survive in more than just a chronic illness way.

I honestly don’t know what’s more responsible for ruining my life… fibromyalgia or myself.

That’s a very common sentiment with fibromyalgia patients. Doctors, take notes.

Really, I don’t want to make this a Whiner McBabypants post. But right now I will tell you what I am currently experiencing:

  • Numbness in my left pinky that has lasted for a week
  • Severe pain that has lasted in my shoulders for about a year
  • Tingling and stumbling of my fingertips

Basically fibromyalgia is weird and uncomfortable, like a sweaty kid at a high school dance that thinks it’s okay to use axe spray instead of shower. I don’t mean to diminish our pain, not at all, especially on awareness day. But for the nature of my sanity I have to. Which brings me to things that helps me with MY fibromyalgia:

  • Listening to upbeat EDM songs
  • Going outside and smelling flowers
  • People not giving me more shit than I can handle
  • EMDR (there are therapists that specialize in pain therapy and trauma therapy, these are great)
  • Reading books about strong females
  • Writing (as you can tell the writing is mainly bullet lists, but I have lack of coordination in my fingertips today)
  • Tai chi
  • People being kind and understanding, which means that yes, I look different than I do a year ago, it’s fine. No, I can’t do that thing. It’s not my fault. Thank you.

What makes fibromyalgia suck more:

  • Assholes
  • Being forced to do manual labor when I absolutely cannot do it
  • Being told to just do the magic normal able bodied thing and health will just fall from the sky
  • Being told to do some diet thing and the unicorn of health will bestow her grace upon me and I’ll be up on her like the Dark Lord out of a Harry Potter book
  • My PTSD being triggered like a shark smelling the blood of a newborn, panicked squirrel in the water
  • Basically, DON’T BE AN ASSHOLE. BE NICE TO PEOPLE.

IN CONCLUSION:

As fibromyalgia currently has no cure, the best thing we have is to love each other.