Fibromyalgia Comfort Wear Wardrobe

Disclosure: Bear in mind that some of the links in this post are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase I will earn a commission. Keep in mind that I link these companies and their products because of their quality and not because of the commission I receive from your purchases. The decision is yours, and whether or not you decide to buy something is completely up to you.

If you’re anything like me, not long after you were diagnosed with fibromyalgia, you searched for answers. From everything from diet to treatment, to bras to footwear. You soon discovered that your body was ultra-sensitive to fabrics and you’ve probably ditched a bra by this point. I’m here to share some Holy Grail products of mine that I’ve found work like a charm.

The products below are enough to give you an entire wardrobe of comfort – I even included a bra! All of the items included come in multiple colors and patterns, so you can order multiple and mix and match for instant Spoonie Style, my Fibromyalgia Fashionistas.

1.Old Navy Jersey Knit Swing Dress for Women

This essential T-Shirt dress comes in 10 different patterns and colors. When I was first diagnosed with fibromyalgia, my mom took me to Old Navy and gifted me 3. I later thrifted 1. These are comfortable enough to wear without a bra. This is my favorite Fibromyalgia Fashionista find on this list.

My Pick: Old Navy Jersey Swing Dress for Women

2. Old Navy High-Waisted Leggings 2-Pack for Women

These are my favorite pair of leggings – a pack of one black and one gray, and there’s a plus size version too! My weight fluctuates with fibromyalgia and I am bottom heavy, so finding leggings to keep up is difficult. I find these are the Elastigirl of leggings at a great price.

My Picks: Old Navy High-Waisted Leggings 2-Pack for Women

3. Juniors’ Joe B Paperbag Waist Wide Leg Pants

Now I will admit, these Paperbag Waist Wide Leg pants aren’t for everyone, but they will snazz up an outfit. These are for real Fashionista Spoonies looking for Spoonie Style! They’re fresh, they’re funky, and they’re soft as yoga pants with more breathing room and style. The Paperpag pants come in multiple colors and patterns from Kohls.

My Pick: Juniors’ Joe B Paperbag Waist Wide Leg Pants

4.Amazon Brand Daily Ritual Women’s Jersey Short Sleeve Open Crewneck Tunic

This soft tunic available in multiple colors is long enough to be a dress on some people – if you’re under 5’4″ – but makes an extremely comfortable shirt. Comfort like this is perfect for Fibromyalgia Fashionistas. Nothing scratches against your chest and it makes excellent street clothes or pajamas.

My Pick: Amazon Brand Daily Ritual Women’s Jersey Short Sleeve Open Crewneck Tunic

5. The Genie Bra 3 Pack

For those of you with fibromyalgia who cannot go without a bra, this is for you. The Genie Bra is comfortable, breathable, and supportive. However, use the sizing chart and order one size up as it runs small in the band, which is a no-no for costochrondritis and rib cage pain. As long as you order one size up, you will have perfect Fibromyalgia Fashionista comfort. The Genie Bra is a type of sports bra and you will have to pull it over your head, which I can still do. Unlike many sports bras, it is a low V-neck, making wearing low-cut shirts possible. Look out for a full review from me on the Genie Bra soon.

My Pick: The Genie Bra 3 Pack

On Footwear

Your mileage may vary depending on what your symptoms are. If your fibromyalgia involves swelling like me, you may find yourself living in boots all of the time. I always wear high quality Chelsea boots, right now my brand of choice is Franco Sarto. Others have fallen arches and must wear orthotic shoes – I used to do this until my feet became too swollen.

For most Spoonie Fashionistas, I would recommend something soft with arch support, like a running shoe specifically fitted to your foot at a running store, or high quality boots that are expensive. Spend at least 30 minutes in the store trying on the boots. The boots should have a low heel, low height and have a zipper. If you’re in Texas, cowboy boots could work fine – take it from a Texan. However, your leg could get stuck in the boot if you swell while wearing the cowboy boots.

Mix and Match to Build Your Wardrobe

Have some cardigans laying around pre-chronic illness? Pair it with a tunic and some leggings for some cute laid back street style. Add a beanie or beret for some artistry.

Pair the tunic of a corresponding color with the Paperbag pants for an instant Fibromyalgia Fashionista “wow!”

The little knit dresses go with everything, especially the solid color ones, so have fun with those, Spoonie Styler!

Wedding Regrets

With the onset of COVID-19, I’ve seen many distressed brides grieving the loss of their wedding dates. Some brides have been planning for over two years only to have their hard work and dreams wiped away. To you, I apologize for this post, and take consolation in my disappointments in my own wedding.

It’s hard to look at my wedding photos anymore because of wedding regrets. I have many, and my biggest golden kernel of advice to couples is this:

Never, never EVER let someone else pay for your wedding. Not if you’re marrying a trust funder, not if your parents are insisting, not if you can’t pay yourself. Save up your dollars and have an extended engagement, then use those cold hard Benjamins to have the wedding YOU want.

Why am I saying this?

When you pay for your own wedding, you have complete control over how the wedding goes on. If your mother or your in-laws are calling the shots because you’re too broke or you’re used to taking hand-outs from your rich parents, guess what, it’s technically their show.

My wedding was a nightmare. It was thrown together in 48 hours after my parents decided I was getting married a day early in their house, not at our friend’s venue, and our guest list was going from 80 to 20. Because of the short notice and that it was being held on a week night, none of my friends could get off work so they couldn’t come. It was me and my husband’s family, who I had issues with. There was no music, no dancing, no fun. This was the opposite of how I wanted it.

The door bell even rang as we had our first kiss.

Additionally, I was in pain the whole time, and my face looks horrible in pictures. It’s in a huge frown because of the physical and emotional discomfort I felt.

So, my parents insisted on paying for my wedding, and they forced me to jump ship on my already planned one for an emergency Bridezilla catastrophe because they held the purse strings.

So, what did I originally want?

I wanted to get married at Cinderella’s Castle in Disney World in the summer. My husband vetoed, saying his parents wouldn’t come to a theme park for a wedding. So my next step was to go the traditional route for my parent’s religion, and get married at our friend’s children’s camp. I tried to order catering from Freebirds, also vetoed by in-laws. I quickly realized I was going to have to miraculously turn beer into champagne on my meager budget.

I planned a country wedding at my parent’s behest and with their dollar. But I had been dreaming about a Disney wedding ever since I learned about them at age 13.

The Lesson?

Bear and I should have saved up money to go to Disney World, or some other place nearby. That way, we would have been in control.

If you’re unable to wait to get married on champagne tastes, or even beer tastes, please consider a court house. Halfway through wedding planning you’ll be dying to run to one anyhow.

But really, is there any such thing as being in complete control of your wedding?

Remember, wedding regrets are normal. But there’s a big way to avoid catastrophe wedding regrets: take the reins.

The best way to not have wedding regrets in the midst of COVID-19? Focus on the love of your life.

All in all, I do not regret getting married. There is a big difference between wedding and married. I had wanted to get weddinged in the summer, however, we all know this crazy coronavirus mess is going on right now and we don’t know when it’s going to end. I’m currently riding out the coronapocalypse with my sexy awesome husband who I love very much, and am extremely glad to have married! I just wish he could have been my official Prince Charming in Cinderella’s Castle, possibly in December when we had wed.

Taking Care of Yourself With Chronic Illness

Every once in a while, a well-intentioned family member, a friend, or a medical professional will tell me I’m not fighting hard enough, that I’m not taking care of myself, et cetera.
The opposite used to be true – I would receive compliments from my doctors for the presentations I would make each time I came in. One nurse said she could tell I was not succumbing, and complimented me for my strength, saying this was why she wanted to help me.

There’s a few things I want to say here. First, all people with chronic illnesses deserve help and respect, whether you perceive them to be weak or strong. Secondly, when it comes to battles, you win some and you lose some. Wars fluctuate, and health is a journey – it isn’t linear. When I was first diagnosed with fibromyalgia, I was exercising at least an hour a day, every day, sometimes two hours, and had a strict vegan diet. Then winter came with worse symptoms and I was planning a wedding with in-laws I had issues with. My mental health was in the toilet, and as Bruce Lee wisely said, “The body follows the mind.”

My mind worsened as my PTSD triggered and my marriage fell apart before it really even began. Again, the body follows the mind, and I got knocked off of my pursuit of physical health horse in pursuit of improving my mental health and my marriage. Once again reiterating, the body follows the mind.

This is not to give a laundry list of excuses. I merely want to extrapolate a bit that the body and mind are connected, and if the mind suffers, the body usually does too. I’m in more stress than I ever have in my life. My fibromyalgia is kicking it in to high gear.

So yes, I may not be taking as good care of my self physically right now, but I am trying to invest in my mind to get to that point. The only way out of hell is through. A marriage being under the gun takes precedence over buying organic food, especially if you can’t afford it and the two of you are $3k over in medical bills. Could the organic food prevent the medical bills? Possibly. Could a gym membership? Possibly.

This is the crux of it: health being accessible and affordable. Many low income Americans suffer the most from health maladies because they can’t afford preventative care and the care they need from not being able to take care of themselves.

My husband and I aren’t low income, but the two of us on one salary with all of my exorbitant medical bills puts us in a bind.

And I am fighting in other ways – I still stay organized with my symptoms, I’m still productive, and I annoy my doctors if I think something is wrong. I read literature on health subjects. I hope to have a book review or two coming out soon.

Please remember that when people say these things to you, they’re probably trying to be helpful. No one can truly understand anyone else. Take heart.

My Fibromyalgia Exercise Plan

Disclosure: Bear in mind that some of the links in this post are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase I will earn a commission. Keep in mind that I link these companies and their products because of their quality and not because of the commission I receive from your purchases. The decision is yours, and whether or not you decide to buy something is completely up to you.

This past week a friend confronted me about how I wasn’t taking care of myself, and I had to admit that I wasn’t doing exactly everything I could to fight fibromyalgia. A big problem that I have is physical therapy because my husband and I simply can’t afford it. I tried it four times before we realized we went 3k over our budget. It did help, but if there is no money, there’s no money.

Then there is yoga. I have a hard time focusing on yoga nowadays due to fibrofog. When I was first diagnosed with fibromyalgia in August 2019, I tackled it head on like a football player on a ball. I exercised for almost two hours every day until winter began. What I did was yoga for 45 minutes, then I would swim for another 45 minutes.

As an already trained yogi I could do yoga with minimal guidance. However, winter came and ouched my joints and fascia. I also had to plan two weddings – my original big outdoor wedding and then my emergency house wedding. The stress was high, and my body deteriorated. I fell off the exercise horse.

After my wedding, things got even more worse with family situations. However, now I’m at a place where I believe I can start gently getting back into exercise.

My Gentle Fibromyalgia Exercise Routine: 5 Minute Increments

The key to my exercise routine is to exercise for 30 minutes, broken up in 6 rounds of 5 minute increments throughout your day.

First thing in the morning, do four different yoga stretches.

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay

Start by stretching your arms overhead, then touch your toes. Swing your arms back up above your head and lean your arms from side to side.

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay

Breathe in, swoop your arms directly above the center of your head, then draw them down to the center of your chest at your heart.

Now, you’re ready for your five minute interval!

The Five Minute Interval Cardio

Set a timer on your phone for 5 minutes, turn on your favorite music, and hop on your exercise bike, jump rope, elliptical, or trampoline.

I used an exercise bike, but not everyone has those. You could also punch a punching bag, just make sure it’s a cardio workout and you only do it for five minutes.

Then, when you’re finished, set a timer for one hour. Then go through the yoga stretches and the 5 minute cardio again until you’ve completed 6 rounds.

Notes

If you need more rest than an hour, it’s okay. I didn’t strictly follow the hour rule due to things needing to be done, but it’s a useful tool.

If you have any physical therapy exercises that can be done while doing your intervals, such as shoulder rolls, do them!

My Immunosuppressed Romance: Love In the Time of COVID-19

Disclosure: Bear in mind that some of the links in this post are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase I will earn a commission. Keep in mind that I link these companies and their products because of their quality and not because of the commission I receive from your purchases. The decision is yours, and whether or not you decide to buy something is completely up to you.

With COVID-19 declared a pandemic, I became curious about it today. By curious, I mean panicked.

The reason I had been avoiding reading the news about it was to create an illusion that I’d be okay by creating ignorance. This is because I’m an immunosuppressed person, and have been so for about a year.

As an immunosuppressed person, I am among the most vulnerable to COVID-19 because of my fibromyalgia and hypothyroidism. For those who have fibromyalgia and are unaware or unsure that fibromyalgia is immunosuppressed, due to prolonged high levels of inflammation, fibromyalgia does compromise your immune system, per The Fibro Manual by Dr. Ginevra Liptan, MD.

Before COVID-19 became a pandemic, my husband frequently talked about it with me. Today I understood why – mainly because I was reading Dr. Liptan’s book – and joined in on the conversation more. No longer was I joining in on pointing disparaging fingers on social media. I was panicking inside… and a little bit out. However, I was cute about it.

My husband and I have some distance between us, and today he called me on the phone and immediately began talking about COVID-19. He spoke of how depressed he was about it, his fears for me. Then he asked me if I could come home this weekend.

My response?

“You know, with all this pandemic and my being immunosuppressed… at the end of the day I’m supposed to spend my life with somebody and that’s you. If all we have left is a short little while, I’m coming home to you immediately.”

I could hear him smile through the phone.

Earlier he expressed anxiety about my health in the midst of COVID-19, and proceeded to tell me:

“With the virus you’re better off staying in the country in one place hiding out like you’ve been doing. But yes, I do want to see you this weekend.”

Love in the time of cholera?

Try love in the time of COVID-19.

Bear and I are taking COVID-19 very seriously, as we plan to get me back home safely, but the fact that he cares so much makes dealing with the anxiety that much easier. It’s not safe to go alone.

2am Pain Flare Prayer Time Reflections

Crown of thorns with text “Exploring faith and pain”

Very often I wake up at 2am in intense pain. The pain continues until sunrise; I’m unable to fall back asleep. I do many things while the pain has set on. Mainly I read, write, and design. My largest comfort by far is prayer and some light Bible reading.

I wrote a piece for the Mighty entitled How My Faith Gives Me Comfort and Companionship With Chronic Illness about this phenomenon, how I read through the Gospels aloud and cry, knowing the Savior himself also had chronic pain for his last time on Earth. We serve a God who was disabled in the flesh for a time as a human being, yet was still perfect. I can’t think of a greater comfort.

Tonight I started out by thanking God for the gift of his son Jesus, for giving me someone I could always relate to. Someone who could show me I did not have to strive to be accepted, to be loved, to love myself back, even in the midst of all this pain I was in in the middle of a world that did not understand me.

Perhaps this is something of what it means in John 1 where it is written: “The Light shines in the darkness, but the darkness has not understood it.”

Possibly very obviously so, as no one understood Jesus and he understood what was in a person, so he understands us when no one understands us.

As I contemplate these things after my prayer of thanksgiving for the Christ and the intricacies of my husband, I felt the pain lift a little after a while. Miraculous healing or redirecting of the mind? Probably both. God gives us peace and hope when we focus on Him.

Peace be with you,

M. O’Shea

How to Feel Gorgeous on a Bad Pain Day

Bring the spa to you on a bad pain day when you have chronic illness!
Disclosure: Bear in mind that some of the links in this post are affiliate links and if you go through them to make a purchase I will earn a commission. Keep in mind that I link these companies and their products because of their quality and not because of the commission I receive from your purchases. The decision is yours, and whether or not you decide to buy something is completely up to you.

I’m a big believer that you should feel fabulous all the time, even if you don’t think you look it or feel it. As someone with a chronic illness, particularly a stigmatized chronic illness like fibromyalgia, this can be hard. A large obstacle to me feeling like I’m gorgeous or believing I’m fabulous is when my pain levels are high. Nothing can make me hate myself more when my body leads me to believe it hates me – even though from a logical standpoint, I know it doesn’t.

Removing myself from my chronic pain is impossible on bad pain days, nor should I do so completely. But there is a way to be friends with yourself and your body to feel gorgeous on a bad pain day with chronic illness.

Listen to a lighthearted audiobook

I especially enjoy Rainbow Rowell’s audiobooks, and right now a favorite is Eleanor & Park. A good, girly audiobook to transform me into the Chronic Illness Warrior Princess of my dreams is just what I need to feel gorgeous on a bad pain day.

Bestsellers to help you build your reading list.

Soft, fabulous blankets

Help your body feel gorgeous with luxury fabrics in – and this is important – your favorite colors! Looking at your favorite colors will remind your mind of pleasant things, and the wholesome, needed comfort of the blankets will bring your body back to a sateen Earth, where you are queen of your own world. A mind-body tactile connection is perfect for conquering all kinds of chronic illnesses and the pain that comes with them.

Stick-on nails

I’m the kind of girl who has to have her nails done, but was a budget bride and is a thrifty wife short on cash. Any day of the week can be manicure day with imPRESS Stick-On Nails available on Amazon or at your local drug store. Even on my worst chronic pain days, with swollen hands, I can maneuver these easy to use press-on nails for a glamorous from the spa manicure. (They’re better than the spa manicures I’ve gotten, honestly.) If one falls off, simply pick it up and gently press back on.

Scented Lotion

Lotion is one of the many ways I cope with chronic pain and anxiety. I’m a big believer in aromatherapy, which will be outlined further below. My holy grail lotion is Dream Cream from Lush. It’s lightly scented with rose water and is a cult favorite for those with eczema and psoriasis. The lotion is extremely decadent and creamy, making you feel as if you deserve this luscious treatment. You do, my fellow Chronic Illness Warrior Queen! This is an excellent, simple way to feel gorgeous on a bad pain day.

Bring the spa home with these skin care products.

Candles

Bring the outside in or travel to exotic destinations with your candle scents of choice, or if you are sensitive to smells, simply watch a flickering flame. When my chronic illness keeps me from traveling I love to imagine a high desert sky with a tuberose scent or trekking across Morocco with sandalwood. Please note that like unscented candles, there are also unscented lotions to help you feel safe from migraines and luxurious.

Create Your Own Story

If you absolutely can’t move or get out of bed because of a flare from your chronic illness, record a video of yourself telling a story about your day from your imagination. Perhaps you are an enchanted knight, a princess in disguise, or a fairy queen out for revenge. Or maybe you’re just out for morning coffee. Make it as simple or grandiose as you want. Maybe just vent! Be your own best friend. It can be lonely trapped inside because of fibromyalgia, lupus, rheumatoid arthritis, or any other chronic illness imaginable.

Remember, it’s just one day.

No matter how long you’ve been in a chronic pain flare, don’t let your mind extend the pain into tomorrow. We only ever have now. Feel what you feel now, and honor yourself by saying, “I’m in pain, and I can handle this,” or if you can’t believe that, try “I’m in pain, and I am not alone.”

My Chronic Illness Warrior Queens, we are never alone when we have bad pain days. We find fabulousness in ourselves and in each other.

Remember you’re gorgeous,

M. O’Shea

The F Word: Fibromyalgia

My doctors have been running around in circles after my elusive diagnosis. I need an EMG before everything is finalized, but yesterday I got a second opinion from another rheumatologist and he said the F word: Fibromyalgia.

This was my original diagnosis, before the hypothyroidism, reduced kidney function and ANA levels were found, as well as the fact that I am treatment resistant to literally everything – from your standard fibro meds to steroids.

I talked to my husband about the F word last night and he was upset. To him, this could not be fibromyalgia. Something as horrible and hard to treat could not be fibromyalgia, and the doctor said it did not have a rheumatological cause. How could this be fibromyalgia?

Well, there is a pretty big stigma around fibromyalgia. It’s often made fun of by the media (although I’m not quite sure why, writers are often fucked up people and have illnesses themselves and may be poking fun at their own predicaments) and it’s unexplained. Nobody knows what causes it. After the appointment, noticing I was upset, my mom said that “Fibromyalgia is unexplained nerve pain.”

I’ve been grieving my diagnoses for a long time, and to end up back at fibromyalgia after my urgent care visit in July 2019 would really hurt. But does the fibro explain my swelling, my joints cramping up? Is that my gout?

Just as you’d be confused and angered when some stranger cuts you off in traffic and says “F- you!”, I am equally confused and angered right now.

An illness ins’t a competition and pain isn’t a prize. I don’t want something worse. I will thank God if I do have fibromyalgia. However, the process of grieving a diagnosis is very long, and I have multiple confirmed, and it has already taken so much from me without knowing its name.

That’s my opinion on the F word. If I have it great, if I don’t have it, at least I’m a step closer. But still, I’m here.

Why Body Positivity is So Hard For Chronically Ill Women

I had my first EMDR session yesterday, and it went… badly.

In EMDR one of the first things you do is create a safe space for yourself, and I could not visualize myself as I am in that space. I kept seeing the old me, the beautiful former model me, and I began to sob.

As someone who attempts to champion body positivity and beauty is every-ability, I was ashamed at my reaction. I knew that my issues ran deep, but I didn’t know they were this invasive. I saw the girl who I once was in my head and longed to be her. I felt that she as lightyears away, a completely different person from me, and this person existed only a year ago.

Grieved by the fact that I was two different people in such a short amount of time, the tears came. Pain shot up my esophagus, and my shoulders ached.

What’s important to remember is that I am a completely gorgeous, unknown sized, purple haired, green eyed vixen with glittery pink catseye glasses. My double chin? That is fucking gorgeous y’all. My acne? Sexy as hell. My swollen hands and legs? Hot, even if it is part of my disease.

My therapist taught me the Vegas Nerve Stimulator for times of distress, and I must say, it works. She instructed me to put my thumb on my clavicle and my other thumb below my rib cage, and silently repeat to myself “I am a beautiful human being.” I almost believed it, which was better than being in the negative hit points.

I am sexy as hell, and I believe it.

So, why did I have this problem? Why do so many women who go through life altering events, and body altering events, have this problem?

As women we are taught we are our bodies, and that our bodies do not belong to us. Someone else gets to decide if we are sexy as hell, not us. And if that is decided, they have the opportunity and the right to act upon their urges.

But at the same time, beauty is a sacred thing, like art. I believe all life is a form of art, which is a reason why I enjoy painting and drawing nature. There is inherent divinity, and therefore beauty and light, everywhere and in everyone.

When a woman becomes sick, it’s as if that divinity and light is becoming assaulted, because society says sick isn’t beautiful. But real beauty is still there. No other person can negate her divinity and inner light, even if she becomes bitter.

I’m here to tell you to all my ladies down with the sickness, you never lost your beauty.
Now I’m reminded of the Alanis Morissette song that goes, “I’m sick but I’m pretty, BABY, and what it all goes down to my friends, is that everyone’s gonna be QUITE ALL RIGHT!”

My fellow gals, you are sick and you’re pretty, you are beautiful and divine, own that acne, own that messy hair, YOU ARE SEXY AS HELL.

List of all the ways I’ve been loved TODAY

When a person comes around to recognize their blessings, they need to record them. It’s like taking photographs of favorite destinations, making a collage, and displaying it teenager-style like your soul anthem on your bedroom wall. There, your memories wait for you each time you go to sleep.

I’ve been suffering on multiple fronts lately and I want to acknowledge the ways people have loved me TODAY, even if it was part of their job description:

  • The librarian who showed me Convenience Store Woman, recommended it to me, and had a conversation about it with me after she noted how much I read in a short amount of time. Thank you for your book love that is a part of your job description but still needed.
  • Sayaka Murata, for writing Convenience Store Woman, so that I could find it today and laugh my ass off when I asked the librarian for the happiest book in the library
  • Bear, for buying me books, queso, and enchiladas. Money can’t buy you love but they can buy you comfort. Thank you for loving me in this dimension today.
  • Bear, who shows genuine love and concern by answering all of my phone calls at work despite our current living situation, who truly does care, and won’t let me forget it. Thank you for loving me genuinely and unconditionally.
  • Bear’s friend, who was asked by Bear to check up on me, and did even though she didn’t have to. Thank you for being a friend of Bear and consequently, of mine, even if you may have gotten more than you bargained for.
  • My friends, for periodically checking on me, texting and calling throughout my day.
  • Random person on roll20 who noticed my distress at being unable to dungeon my dragons, thanks for reaching out to a freaked out person going through a DBT skills breakdown.
  • Mom, for driving me to DBT and the library because the doctors say I can’t drive right now.
  • Mom and dad, for driving me to meet Bear tonight for our date.
  • Dad, for trying to fix the record player so I could experience vinyl and not rely on digital technology to listen to music.
  • Indoor plumbing, for giving me a hot shower and a soaking bath. You do you man!
  • Me, for taking time out of my day to try to learn some new ukulele songs, devote time to music when I haven’t in years, and feed my brain. Learning to love you too boo.

Feel free to share ways that you felt loved TODAY in the comments! I would love to feel the love, and I’m sure you would too!